.:.:[ Disclaimer ]:.:. Uh, it's simple really. It's a roleplay. It's not reality. Don't take it personally, and layout is a variation of a layout by the handler of Jeff Jarrett. To those who actually intend to read these, rather than scroll through it just to see how long it is, sit back in your padded chairs, grab your potato chips, chocolates, licorice, donuts and diet pepsi, adjust your coke bottle lenses and enjoy! C'mon BABY ... ARE YOU READY?
.:.:[ Segment Title ]:.:. When The Heartbreak Kid speaks... YOU LISTEN!
.:.:[ People Used ]:.:.
.:.:[ Foreword ]:.:. The first show of Xtreme Hardcore Wrestling has come and gone. The hype for the show was immense, and it did not disappoint in the least bit. Nor did The Heartbreak Kid Shawn Michaels! On two occasions earlier in the week, HBK made himself perfectly clear when he said that not only would Smackdown! be special because it will go down in history as the first XHW event ever, but it will also go down in history as the triumphant return of the man who has brought the sport of wrestling where it is today. He also stated that he would not walk away from this match as the loser, but rather, the winner, in very impressive fashion. What did he do? He came, lived up to his talk, and KICKED ASS! Shawn Michaels is a step closer to the top spot in the business. His first match showed no signs of ring rust, and he's proven to us that his injuries are no longer a factor. Shawn Michaels is wrestling without pain for the first time in half a decade. We're looking at the Shawn Michaels who went from the first man in the rumble, to the being the last man in the rumble, breaking the record for the longest anyone has remained in the Royal Rumble. We're looking at the Shawn Michaels who put on one of the best matches in the history of wrestling with Scott Hall at one of those memorable WrestleMania events. At that time, Shawn Michaels was up and coming. Now, he's already on top. All he needs is the title to prove it. In his first segment, the question was asked "Dare to doubt him now?" Well, he did what he told you he was going to do... Dare to doubt him now?!
That's one dumb move ole' HBK wouldn't make!
.:.:[ Scene ]:.:. The scene opens during the main event of the Smackdown! show, backstage, in the showers of the HBK locker room. Field of vision steps through the entrance to the shower. The sound of water hitting the floor with force can be heard, and to a louder extent, so can HBK, singing the tune of "Johnny B. Good". The camera advances further into the showers, until finally getting HBK in the scene. The steam provided by the showers conveniently covers all private parts, as he's scene here, naked, running his fingers through his hair, under the falling water. The camera takes another step, and suddenly, Shawn stops singing. With shampoo in his eyes, he doesn't see a thing, but he has a pretty good guess as to who just walked in...
.:.:[ Shawn Michaels ]:.:. SON OF A BITCH! [ The camera stops dead in it's tracks. ] You'd think you XHW interviews would respect a man's right to privacy at least while he's showering! Do you bother wrestlers while they're on the can? WELL, DO YOU MICHAEL COLE?!
.:.:[ Woman's Voice ]:.:. Uh, Shawn... I'm not Michael Cole.
.:.:[ Scene ]:.:. Shawn quickly turns his head in the direction in which the voice is coming from. Knowing by the sound of the voice, the woman can't be half bad, he puts a smile on his face.
.:.:[ Woman's Voice ]:.:. I'm Pamela Paulshock. I'm a new interviewer around here, and as silly as this may sound, I wanted you to be my first. Interview that is... I'm sorry if I upset you. I just wanted to get this interview going as soon as possible.
.:.:[ Shawn Michaels ]:.:. No need for apologizes, babe. I'm just glad you're not Michael Cole! I'm almost finished here.
.:.:[ Scene ]:.:. Still smiling, knowing he's about to have a good time, Shawn turns off the water in the shower. Pamela, holding the camera on her shoulder, turns away from Shawn, being lady like, and not sneaking a peak at him while he's naked. Shawn wipes the water from his eyes, and looks up to see just who has intruded on his showering. Once he lays eyes on her, he's not disappointed. He whispers to himself, "YES!" while reaching for his towel.
.:.:[ Pamela Paulshock ]:.:. I'm sorry, Shawn. Did you say something?
.:.:[ Shawn Michaels ]:.:. Nah, babe. Not a thing.
.:.:[ Scene ]:.:. Shawn wraps the towel around his waist, after using it to dry himself off. He runs his fingers through his hair, pushing it back, then steps out of the mist, and fully in vision. In nothing but a towel, he extends his hand, and says...
.:.:[ Shawn Michaels ]:.:. It's always a pleasure to meet a woman as FINE as you!
.:.:[ Pamela Paulshock ]:.:. Well-
.:.:[ Scene ]:.:. Pamela turns back around, and when she sees Shawn, she gasps a bit in surprise and disbelief. She to herself, "He's even cuter in person! And his body!", as she takes Shawn's hand to shake.
.:.:[ Pamela Paulshock ]:.:. Th-, Thank you. [ Shawn turns her hand palm down, this tenderly kisses it. ]
.:.:[ Shawn Michaels ]:.:. Like I said, it's my pleasure. [ Shawn gives one of those winning winks, with a smile. ]
.:.:[ Pamela Paulshock ]:.:. Well, Shawn. Where do you want to do this? [ Shawn grins. ] The interview I mean.
.:.:[ Shawn Michaels ]:.:. Oh, I know what you mean... It's just... [ Shawn bites his bottom lip, and puts on an innocent act. ] It's just I don't feel comfortable doing this interview with you in a towel, while you wear clothes.
.:.:[ Pamela Paulshock ]:.:. Then why don't you put on some clothes?
.:.:[ Shawn Michaels ]:.:. [ Shawn chuckles. ] No, no, no, Pamela. Pamela, right? [ She nods her head. ] I don't have a problem with what I'm wearing... I have a problem with what you're wearing.
.:.:[ Pamela Paulshock ]:.:. Ex- Excuse me?
5 Minutes Later
.:.:[ Scene ]:.:. The scene re-opens with Shawn in his towel, and now Pamela in a towel, covering her chest, and lower region. Yeah, I guess that's one way to put it. They're both holding a glass of wine, as they talk with each other on the couch. Pamela's hair is moist, like Shawn's, as if she's just stepped out of the shower. In front of them sits the television. The main event is half way over, as Pamela is laughing, at something Shawn has just said. It's obvious a connection has been made, as we listen in on the conversation...
.:.:[ Pamela Paulshock ]:.:. ...and yeah Shawn, I must admit, this was a good idea. I feel sooo refreshed after that shower, and this is really comfortable, sitting here-
.:.:[ Shawn Michaels ]:.:. In a towel!
.:.:[ Pamela Paulshock ]:.:. With The Heartbreak Kid!
.:.:[ Shawn Michaels ]:.:. [ They share a laugh. ] Well hey, I wasn't done showerin' anyway. So, whenever, and I mean WHENEVER you need to shower at an XHW event, you know who to come to. Oh, and being a perfect gentlemen, I must say, you have an incredible RACK!
.:.:[ Pamela Paulshock ]:.:. Oh yeah, Shawn, that was very gentlemen like. [ She laughs a little, and takes a sip of wine. ]
.:.:[ Shawn Michaels ]:.:. FREEZE! Uh yeah, this is HBK interrupting your regularly scheduled Heartbreak Kid program to have a little word with those of you enjoying this segment. Now, the true guys out there are saying, "What? You can't say something like that to a woman?!" Well, to you I say, "You can if you're The Heartbreak Kid", or if you're talking to a woman who's involved in the wrestling business. Let me tell you, chicks in the wrestling business are the best chicks to date! You can be so frank with them. You can tell them whatever comes to your mind, and you know, with HBK, and that's a MUST, cause I always say what comes to mind. On another note, this chick is a fox. Really, I'm sitting there on the couch like "DAMN, where have you been all my life!", and I'm sure she's feelin' the same thing times ten for The HB Kid. And now, I return you to entertainment by the one who does it best, The Heartbreak Kid Shawn Michaels...
.:.:[ Pamela Paulshock ]:.:. Well Shawn, I came to do my job- To interview you, that is.
.:.:[ Shawn Michaels ]:.:. Oh, shoot, babe...
.:.:[ Pamela Paulshock ]:.:. How do you feel after defeating Chris Jericho to advance to the second round of the tournament?
.:.:[ Shawn Michaels ]:.:. In all honestly, babe, I feel damn good! Not just because I met you shortly after the win, which is a big reason by the way, I feel good because I love winning. Winning is what I do best, hands down, no doubt it about. I've been a winner my whole life, and to come back to wrestling and lose my first match was something that I COULD NOT let happen under any circumstances. As far as I'm concerned, there's no room for error in this tournament. I MUST win every damn match that comes my way, because I'm out to prove something. I'm out to prove that I was, and still am the best damn wrestler the sport has ever seen! Losing to Jericho would have not made that mission possible, and neither will losing in this tournament. The World Title is coming home to a man who truly needs it. A man who truly deserves it. That man IS The Heartbreak Kid!
.:.:[ Pamela Paulshock ]:.:. Shawn, like I stated before, you have advanced to the second round of the tournament. What we want to know now is, what are your feelings on your opponent, Justin Credible?
.:.:[ Shawn Michaels ]:.:. Justin who? Credible? I'm a reliable man, Pamela. I mean, I'm credible. You can take my word on anything, anything at all. I'm going to tell you right now... Monday Night Nitro, I'm going to kick this guy's ass! I can't be anymore honest about this. That's just the way it's gonna be, because The Heartbreak Kid says so! Like I said to Jericho, he's just a guy standing in my way to get to that World Title. He means nothing more to me than that. Before I found out about this match, I didn't even care if this joke existed. Now, I do care. His existence is standing, or tryin' to stand in my way from achieving the richest prize in the business. At this point, yeah, his existence means something to me. After I beat him though, I could careless what this turkey does! At that point, I'll have bigger fish to fry, and I'll be that much closer to my ultimate goal. I will dominate this promotion! MARK MY WORDS! And like I said, I'm credible. You can definitely take the word of the Showstoppa, just ask Jericho!
.:.:[ Pamela Paulshock ]:.:. What about The X-Factor?
.:.:[ Shawn Michaels ]:.:. What about them? I know Tha X-Factor better than they know themselves. The attitude they carry around, like they're big shots around this place was an attitude established by ME! Let's go back for a second. Back to the days I ruled the wrestling world! Back to the days of D-Generation-X! The attitude, the charisma, the antics, IT WAS ALL ME! After I left, Degeneration X thrived, but it was me who gave it life. I breathed life in DX, and everything about it oozes my personality. Tha X-Factor is no different, it's just being done by three guys who have no business carrying the attitude The Heartbreak Kid made cool. Why? While Hunter and I had reason to belief we were the hottest thing in wrestling, because, well, we were, Tha X-Factor is a band of three losers trying to revive something that was laid to rest a long time ago. The other thing is, none of them have accomplished a damn thing. You wanna mouth off about being the best or the coolest? Then prove that you're the best or the coolest! Tha X-Factor hasn't done that YET! To make this short and simple, Tha X-Factor is X-Pac's project to see if he can thrive in the spotlight as the leader, instead of the follower, since he's been a follower his entire career. There's nothing more to it. He's using Credible and Albert, to prove his worth, and they're too damn stupid and mentally weak to realize it or do anything about it. I have no respect for these losers, and their time around here is limited. As a matter of fact, maybe I can do this federation a favor, and put each and every one of these guys on the shelf!
.:.:[ Pamela Paulshock ]:.:. When can I see you again?
.:.:[ Shawn Michaels ]:.:. Whenever suits you, babe. I'm on twenty four seven, seven days a week! Anytime is a good time for The Heartbreak Kid.
.:.:[ Pamela Paulshock ]:.:. That's good to know...
.:.:[ Scene ]:.:. Pamela leans forward, hesitates... Then kisses Michaels on the cheek, gets up and goes into the restroom. Shawn looks into the camera, with a huge smile on his face. Life is good when you're the Heartbreak Kid. Shawn glances at the television, and sees that the main event is over, and Smackdown! has ended.
.:.:[ Shawn Michaels ]:.:. Hey, Pamela! Drop me a line, and get in touch with me later. Right now, I have some business to take care of. Take care darlin'!
.:.:[ Pamela Paulshock ]:.:. Alright! Thanks Shawn!
.:.:[ Shawn Michaels ]:.:. Anytime, babe, anytime!
.:.:[ Scene ]:.:. Shawn throws on a white sports coat, with a red shirt, then slides on some underwear, and then black pants. The camera gets shots of no private parts... Perverts! He throws on a hat, grabs a bag, slides into some boots, then exits the room. The scene re-opens at the end of Smackdown!, the first Xtreme Hardcore Wrestling event! It was an incredible night. One to be remembered. At this point, the ring has been cleared. Triple H was just recently taken out by a Stone Cold Stunner after an impressive victory over Jeff Jarrett. Fans are on their way out of the building, as the cameras take us ringside to Jim Ross and Jerry "The King" Lawler. Each of them are beginning to pack up. They're putting away their head gear, their chairs, and other various things while they carry on a conversation.
.:.:[ Jim Ross ]:.:. What an incredible night we just had! King, I am very excited about the direction this federation is headed in.
.:.:[ Jerry "The King" Lawler ]:.:. JR, I have to agree with you. This was an incredible night. It leads the doors open for some top notch entertainment in the future. I just can't wait until I get into the fun! You know, it was one of those nights you just don't want to end. I was loving every minute of it. From Bischoff and McMahon's stand off, to the electrifying return of The Heartbreak Kid. It was truly a great night.
.:.:[ Jim Ross ]:.:. That's right, King. It was great to see Shawn Michaels back in the ring. It just goes to show that these wrestlers can truly bounce back from anything. Austin came back from seemingly career ending injuries, and in more impressive fashion, Shawn does the same. A back injury can take a few years off your life, King.
.:.:[ Jerry "The King" Lawler ]:.:. Well, I saw no signs of ring rust in The Heartbreak Kid tonight, JR!
.:.:[ Scene ]:.:. With those word, those quite familiar drums accompanied with the screams of women are heard throughout the arena. The exiting crowd stops in their tracks and to the rafters, while "Sexy Boy" plays throughout the arena. Earlier, Shawn made his entrance from the rafters, but this time, HBK takes the normal way to ring, stepping from behind the curtain and saluting the crowd, down on one knee with his hands in the air. He's wearing a white sports coat, with a black Spurs hat, and black jeans, with a red shirt. The crowd begins to make their way back to the seats, screaming as they do it, for The Heartbreak Kid. Jim Ross and Jerry "The King" Lawler are setting up shop once again, with enthusiasm for in the anticipation of hearing what Shawn has to say. Shawn makes his way in usual fashion, dancing and playing to the crowd with a smile on his face, loving every minute of it. Shawn dances down the ring, until making it to the ring. He hops up on the apron, and swings his hips while grasping the ropes. He then steps through the ropes, and begins to twirl in circles in the ring, as the lights dim, with 'HBK' spotlights on the ring. After spinning with his arms out, and finds his place in the center of the ring, and poses for the crowd. Not flexing, obviously because with a sports coat on, there's no muscle to show. Pyro shoots to the rafters behind him, and the fans are still loving every minute of it! Shortly after this, the lights are restored. Shawn grabs the microphone, looks to the crowd and says...
.:.:[ Shawn Michaels ]:.:. NOW CUT MY MUSIC!!
.:.:[ Jim Ross ]:.:. This should be interesting, King.
.:.:[ Scene ]:.:. The music comes to a stop, and so crowd noise volume is lowered. All are anticipation for what Shawn has to say.
.:.:[ Shawn Michaels ]:.:. I'm feeling the love from the Kliq tonight! It's a feeling I never get tired of. Now I don't mean you hold you all up, but... It shouldn't be a problem, am I right?! [ The crowd responds with a "Yeah!", which puts a smile on Shawn's face. ] I mean, a show just isn't a show without The Heartbreak Kid, am I right?! [ The crowd gives the same response. ] And what a show he put on! Earlier this week, I told you. All of you. I told Michael Cole. I told anybody who wanted to listen while taking a trip around the block to the store, and guess what... I TOLD JERICHO! I told you that The Heartbreak Kid was gonna walk into Smackdown! with the band tuned, then play a little "Sweet Chin Music" for Jericho, all the way to my first victory in this place. Now you know you can count on the Showstoppa to come through for ya'! [ The crowd gives a cheer. ] You know, me just standing in this ring talkin' about it isn't enough. Yo, Vinny Mac! Get your boys to roll that footage of HBK putting his foot in Y2J's mouth!
.:.:[ Scene ]:.:. On the the Smackdown! screens, the footage from Shawn's match is brought up. Well, actually, it's footage of Shawn giving an injured Bret Hart the Superkick, knocking him into a wheel chair. Shawn takes a step back and laughs.
.:.:[ Shawn Michaels ]:.:. That's not the footage, but hey, that definitely brings back some memories! Bret Hart, Bret Hart. [ Shawn shakes his head. ] I'm not even going there, but let me tell you where I am going! I'm goin' all the way to the finals in this World Title Tournament! One down, how many to go? Does it matter. Nah, 'cause no matter how long it takes, it's gonna all be worth it. There's no man in this federation who deserves that title more than I do. NOT ONE! Now I am aware of the talent that's in this tournament. Look at this face... Is worry written on it? No way, Jose! I can tell you what's on the other guys in this tournament faces. Fear. Fear of The Heartbreak Kid. Not fear in the form of physical harm. I don't run down people with cars or injury them with sledge hammers, because honestly, I don't care enough about them to waste the energy it would take to do that to them. People, they fear HBK, because they know I am the man to beat in this tournament. It's nothing new to me, though. Because I am who I am, there's a target on my chest everywhere I go, be it the good attention. The good attention is when I'm swarmed by a bunch of chicks who just can't get enough of The Heartbreak Kid. The bad attention is when sadistic people like Triple H plot to take you out with sledge hammers, because they can't handle you in the ring. I get it all the time. I wouldn't be surprised if my next opponent tried something like that. Yeah, that's right, my next opponent. To my surprise it's Justin Credible... He and X-Pac run together with a hairy ass dude by the name of Fat- Prince Albert. Let me be perfectly honest here... This win is going to be easier than the win over Jericho!
.:.:[ Scene ]:.:. Shawn raises one of his arms in the air, and receives a slight cheer. Shawn twirls the microphone in his hand and continues...
.:.:[ Shawn Michaels ]:.:. Credible, you know, HBK knows all and sees all. I occupy most of my energies with my own business, but look around. Credible, you and I both are apart of a business, although competitive, it also serves as a form of entertainment. So, while I'm not in the ring, doing what I do best, and that's beat little nimrods like you, or another thing I do pretty well, which is entertaining the ladies, I kick back and keep track of what's goin' on in the federation. Well, ya' see, doin' just that is how I caught a glimpse of what you had to say to "The One" Billy Gunn, before you and your cronies screwed him out of a win, later on Smackdown!. Now, what you had to say to 'em wasn't bad. Hey, actually, I found it a little funny. Here's the good part, Credible. You see, you sat back and belittled Gunn. Ya' called him a nobody, and said he needed women to get himself over, and other stuff like that. Well, it's funny Credible, because you spoke to Gunn like you were something special. Like you were something incredible. Let HBK set you straight when he tells you in all honesty, ya' ain't worth a damn thing! Oh, and you can take my word for that, 'cause Credible, I'm where you thought you were when you were talking down to Gunn. Think about it, he may need a woman to get him somewhere, but you need to other goons to help fight your battles for ya'. What does HBK need to get anywhere in this business? Nothing and nobody. He's his own man, and he's already proven that this early in this return. I'll give it to you, Credible, you're a bigger fish than Gunn, but damn, I'm that much bigger than you! You're a nobody, Credible. I don't even know how you got into this tournament in the first place, but rest assured, I'll do the federation a favor and take your ass OUT! Everything you said to Gunn, I should be saying to you. What goes around, comes around, and in this case, it's gonna come around and kick your teeth down your throat! You gave Gunn a Superkick for the win... Funny, 'cause on Nitro, that's exactly how you're gonna lose! It's not wise screw with The Showstoppa, The Main Event, The Headliner, The Icon of Sports Entertainment. The Heartbreak Kid Shawn Michaels! There's no way I can tell somebody like you that messing with HBK is hazardous to your health. Experience is the best teacher, so Monday, you're gonna experience why Shawn Michaels is not one to be tried.
.:.:[ Scene ]:.:. Shawn gives a cut-throat sign, then smiles. Shawn takes off his hat, then tosses it into the crowd and continues...
.:.:[ Shawn Michaels ]:.:. What a situation you've been put in, Credible. I can only imagine what's going to be going through your peanut head as you and your buddies make your way to the ring, to take on the best thing that every happened to this sport. [ Shawn strokes his hair back. ] Credible, do you really think you can hold a candle to my greatness? Well, do ya', PUNK?! If so, man, you're dumber than Albert looks. I'm the real deal, like Holyfield. Credible, while you got an easy one against Gunn, don't think for a minute that you're getting the same when you step to the plate against the HB Kid! I've seen guys like you come and go, Credible. I've beaten plenty of your kind in the process, but you know what, I never let myself slip to the point where I'd actually let a loser like you beat me. WHOA! If I let that happen, do you think I'd be where I am today?! Get real! And I haven't been in the ring for about four years prior to the beating I gave Jericho, and I still won't let that happen. Oh, and I'm sure your eyes were glued to the t.v. tonight when Shawn Michaels electrified the crowd like the good ole' days. But what impressed you most had to the be the fact that ole' HBK, despite the injury, hasn't lost a step! Notta ONE! Michael Jordan and I have a lot of similarities. He won three World Championships, then stepped away from the game. I won three World Championships, then stepped away from the game. When he won those first three, he was young and was still trying to reach full potential, despite the fact he was already the best damn player in the history of the game. HBK was still working to reach the pinnacle of his abilities, and he was already the best damn wrestler in the history of wrestling. Michael Jordan made his comeback. He was bigger, stronger, and most importantly, smarter... He won three more World Championships. It's time I live up to my side of the bargain as the top guy in my respective sport. It's time I start racking up the World Championships, as the bigger, stronger, and most importantly, smarter HBK. Jordan came back better than he left. Credible, you're dealing with the best damn Heartbreak Kid EVER! Do you really, and I mean really think you have a chance? That would be just incredible if you do, man. Credible, you have nothing on me. Well, maybe you have me in numbers... No, I take that back. One Heartbreak Kid is as good as, oh, I'd say about... [ Shawn begins to use his fingers to count. He looks to the ceiling, as if trying to do the calculations in his head. ] About seven average men. Maybe a little more. Bottomline is, if your friends want to jump in and save your sorry ass, I invite them to join the party. I'm sure the band wouldn't mind playin' couple of rounds on the X-Factor's behalf. Hey, I've always been the coolest cat this side of the Pacific. There's no doubt that every thing I do, I do the asboluuute BEST! And as for the incredible thing...
.:.:[ Scene ]:.:. Shawn takes off his sports coat, and the women are screaming already. then takes off his red shirt, and begins posing in the ring shirtless. The women go wild for this display. Shawn brings the microphone back to his mouth and continues...
.:.:[ Shawn Michaels ]:.:. Need The Kid say more? Oh, of course. This Kid is not coming to play, I'm coming to win. Nothing is fun when you lose, and we ALL know that HBK loves to have fun. Credible, Monday Night, I'm gonna dance all over your face! And after that, I'm gonna let YOU dance a little... That is, to some "Sweet Chin Music", to seal the deal, giving The Heartbreak Kid yet another victory. Oh, and I won't be done there. After that, Credible, I'm gonna check you into the Heartbreak Hotel! It's as simply as that... For me, of course!
OH HOW SWEET IT IS TO BE THE HEARTBREAK KID!
NOW HIT MY MUSIC!!!
.:.:[ Scene ]:.:. "Sexy Boy" promptly hits the speakers, as Shawn Michaels dances a little bit, while the crowd cheers as many of them head for the exits. Shawn walks up the ramp, and once on stage, he waves back to the crowd, then disappears behind the curtain. The scene fades.